Doing & Getting What You Want Treadmill

Excerpt from Chapter 3 - Spiritual Ideas and Choices

One common ensnaring New Age goal is to follow too much the dictate of "doing what you want." Most of the time this is correct, but what about when your soul has tasks that your conscious self wants to avoid? Your conscious self is strongly influenced and controlled in major ways by your adaptive personality, which you adopted as a child out of fear.

It seems totally illogical that the consciousness (that is, your soul) that arranges for perhaps a hundred incarnations of deaths and painful life experiences could have any fear of what happens here on the physical plane. Therefore, I believe your soul has no fear. Your soul wants you to learn life lessons so that you can be without fear, whereas your adaptive personality wants to protect you from suffering and to cover over your fears. Thus, there is an inherent conflict between your adaptive personality and your soul. That is one of the most important reasons why I recommend study of specific books to discover what your soul wants.

To be "oohing" and "aahing" over some teaching or book just shows you what your conscious self likes and wants. I suggest that the more you explore what your soul wants, the more you will be aligned with your life purpose and less trapped by "doing what you want."

Do you realize that what you want always represents what your adaptive personality wants? I think the unwelcome truth is that whatever your soul wants must filter through your adaptive personality. Therefore, what you want is always suspect! I am not suggesting you stop desiring or wishing, for that would surely be a recipe for life stagnation and major spinning of wheels. Questions I suggest asking yourself: "Do I really want this? Will I be satisfied if I get it? Do I really get satisfaction these days from this?" If your answer to these questions is yes, then you will probably need to continue to pursue that "I want." If your answer is no, then you can decide to pursue a different desire.

Suppose you reach the conclusion that a particular "I want" is unspiritual in some way. Therefore, you decide to stop pursuing that "I want." This decision to stop has been made by your adaptive personality, based upon fear (probably fear of doing the wrong thing). Instead, I suggest that you do your self-change work (for example, your favorite therapy or Katie's "The Work") so that the source fears of your adaptive personality are eased. Then, either your "I want" will change of its own accord because you no longer have lessons to be learned or you can now decide that "I want" is OK. This is an important paragraph; please reread it.

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© 2008 by Thayer White
Finding Your Soul in the Spirituality Maze


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Excerpt from Be Your Own Therapist: "I suggest that you trust and explore all impulses. I do not recommend acting upon all. But they are always important to examine and to trust as valid on some level. If the likely consequences of following an impulse are acceptable, then acting on the impulse is also recommended."